They're dropping like flies

There always seems to be some sort of pet related "happening" here at J and P Towers.  They're either popping their clogs - see here and here.  Or, if one has popped their clogs, the other has gone into a steep decline - here.  Or we're finding mangled deer legs in the pets' hay - see here.

Last weekend was yet another pet hoo-ha.  On Friday, Dennis the rabbit who I posted about here, went the way of the fox.  I know!  What a shocker.  We have, for many years, let him run about in the garden and the first time Dennis actually manages to dig his way out, foxy loxy gets him *very sad face*.

Mr J and P and I were talking about him and Mr J and P said that he could never imagine Dennis as an old rabbit and then muttered something about "living fast and dying young."  Y'know, like:

Amy:

Jim:

Kurt:

Jimi:

 and Dennis:

Mmmmmm.  maybe not.......

The next morning, I went to feed the guinea pigs and noticed that Ginny looked very still.  Yup, she'd only gone and kicked the bucket *another sad face*.

Two out of three pets in two days!  I swear when we had to tell Little Miss J and P that another of the pets had died, she looked at us suspiciously as if we were, somehow, responsible for her beloved pets' demise.  It's really not true, I promise!

Here's hoping for a happier, non-pet related weekend this time around. xx

Hay Ho, It's a furry dead thing.

So, one morning recently, Little Miss J and P went to feed the guinea pigs as per usual.  Seconds later I hear hysterical screaming.  Oh God, I thought, please don't say that another guinea pig has popped its clogs.  She comes running out of the room shouting "There's a dead foot in the hay.   And I've touched it!".  Puzzled, I had a nightmarish vision of one of our guinea pigs limping around the cage with only three legs and the fourth nestling in the hay bedding. 

Fortunately, Mr J and P was on hand to investigate further.  He reappeared clutching, in one hand, the bag of hay bought from the local supermarket which we keep by the guinea pigs' cage and, in the other, a dried and still partly furry leg of a ....deer - compelete with black cloven hoof!

Yes, a DEER LEG.  Cue more hysterical screaming - this time from me.

Wanna see a picture?  Of course you do.  Here we go:

A close-up *shudder*:

Nestling in the hay:

What horrified and at the same time amused me was the branding: ‘My Little Friend Meadow Hay’, complete with a cutesy image of  a little bunny, hamster and some other small rodent, together with the promise:"hygienic and easy to use".

What's worrying  are the whereabouts of the the rest of the poor creature's grisly remains?  Are we likely to hear of a flurry of similar scarey finds up and down the country?  Perhaps some other junior pet lover will discover wee Bambi's head, or worse, in another bag.  Maybe another family has hit the jackpot and found a brace of venison steaks.  I dread to think!

Mr J and P, the shameless publicity seeking media whore that he is, contacted our local paper and a day later, we were emblazened across their website.  A day after that and we were featured in the Mail online.  And, this week, Mr J and P and Little Miss were front page news in the local paper and on bill boards outside every newsagents.  They were even featured in the revered publication that is Guinea Pig Today.

Yup, it's all happening here. 

We had to laugh at the Daily Mail readers who accused us of being greedy because we "wanted compensation" and that we should "get a life" (yes, I'm talking to you Bunty of Ipswich).  What a cheek!  Er yes, a bag of hay, preferably without a rotting deer leg, would be nice!

Hay ho, gotta go, deer readers! (that was rubbish, sorry; feel free to come up with better puns in your comments).

BREAKING NEWS: The nice Mr Supermarket man has just sent us some vouchers as compo. Hoorah!

Pets, pooches and pots

Yet another pet has popped its clogs here at J and P towers this week.  Blimey, folks, the allotment will start resembling a pet graveyard at this rate!  Olly the hamster was laid to rest alongside Sooty the guinea pig by the raspberry bush yesterday *sad face*.

Anyway, enough about our dead pets.  I thought I'd show you two of my purchases from last week's jumble sale (don't worry, I'll be showing you all my purchases in every intimate detail  in a forthcoming post).

Now, the pooch ( a fox terrier, I think) is rather adorable but his leg had been glued together badly as you can see here:

But at 10p, I thought "What the heck..." and he came home with me.

Whereupon, I had a brainwave.  I got a piece of ribbon and glued it round the offending badly glued bit (sorry my vocabulary is not its best today) and look at him now:

Mr J and P thinks he looks "a bit bizarre" but what does he know!   What do you think?  Does it look a bit bonkers?

This casserole dish cost me a quid.

Embellished with a marrow decoration

It's Poole pottery and a range called "Lucullus" launched in 1962.  I was going to give this to a friend of mine but I like it too much and am going to keep it (even though I don't need another casserole dish).  Mind you, I was very good and stuck to my "one-in-one-out policy.  In fact, I bettered it by getting rid of three bowls and one plate.

Or so I thought.  I've just discovered that  Mr J and P has snuck back into the cupboard  his chipped childhood melanine bowl with a very faded piccy of Mickey Mouse!

Darn, thought I'd get away with that one!

Have you ever tried to disappear your beloved's belongings without them noticing?  Of course you have!  Come on, spill the beans....

Back to Blog

It's been pet pandemonium at J and P Towers this week.  One of our guinea pigs squeaked her last on Monday and her little sister is in a deep decline - she's stopped eating and we're all on hand feeding duty.  Meanwhile, I'm secretly fearing for our ageing hamster - he's not long for this world - poor ickle thing.  Blimey, readers, I didn't realise pet care could be so exhausting.

Our holidays seem an age ago now.  I can't believe that a week ago we were in the Lake District visiting Grandpappy J and P and the week before that we were in sunny (and extremely hot) Slovenia.

Yes, dear readers, this is the bit where I bore you senseless about our holidays.  Hurrah!

In Ljubljana, the capital of Slovenia, we spent a lot of time taking pics of grafitti art:

and relaxing in the "library under the treetops" - yes an outdoor library in the park, under the shade of some trees (did I mention that it was darn hot) reading English mags - bliss!

 In the north west of the country, we spent a lot of time jumping into lakes and rivers to keep cool.

We even did some white water rafting!  While Mr J and P was praised by the instructor for his "strength" and Little Miss for her "very good back paddling", little old moi had to make a fool of myself when we were deliberately capsized.  I got caught in quite a strong current and in my panic forgot what you're supposed to do.  What you are supposed to do is let the current take you to where it ends, then swim at an angle from where you came.  NEVER swim against the current for you will never win.  I, like a fool, tried swimming against the current and was quickly getting nowhere.  Strangely, my feeble cries for help were roundly ignored by Mr J and P, and another fellow rafter hauled me to safety with his paddle.  What a drama!


Talking of fools, when  we left Ljubljana to go up north in the hire car, Mr J and P was very busy extolling the virtues of the spacious car boot, only to arrive at our destination some hours later to discover that little wonder the boot was so capacious, the silly twit had left my bag back in the hotel in Ljubljana!  While Little Miss and I relaxed by a lake, poor Mr J and P spent the rest of the day driving the capaciously booted car to Ljubljana and back in order to reclaim my stuff.   Awww, bless.......

Our trip to the Lakes to visit Grandpappy was wonderful as always.  The highlight, for me was visiting the Ennerdale Agricultural Show.  Now I do like a good agricultural show.  My favourite event had to be the Cumberland wrestling:

It was brilliant and they even had a team from Brittany (France) participating.

My second favourite thing was the Horticultural and Produce Marquee.  Mr J and P and myself did enjoy looking at the vegetables.  Our very favourite category was entitled "Monsters made from Vegetables and Cocktail Sticks".  Oh no, I fear a new obsession coming on.......

This won first prize a penguin made from an aubergine atop a bed of purple sprouting broccoli.  Genius.

Personally, I think Mr J and P should have won a prize - brace yourselves, dear readers, and feast your peepers on his unfeasibly large beetroot:

Crikey, it's almost as big as his head!

And on that note dear readers, I must go as it's my turn for guinea pig hand feeding duties.  Bye bye. xx

Rabbits

Mr J and P loves his rabbits. Not rabbit pie you understand but cute little furry real live ones. When he was young, he had a little brown rabbit that he imaginatively called Little Brown or LB for short. He often regales us with stories of LB, such as the one where LB used to bound up the stairs in the morning and wake a little Mr J and P up by jumping up on the bed and tickling his (Mr J and P’s) face with his (LB’s) whiskers. Er. Yes. Really.

We have a pet rabbit. A very cute black Netherland Dwarf called Dennis (after Dennis the Menace). The problem with Dennis is that he is the grumpiest, most unfriendly rabbit - probably in the entire world. Here is a picture of him.



Don’t be fooled by his loveable exterior. He harrumphs and snorts when you approach. Then when you scoop him up he lunges at you and tries to nip you or rip you to shreds with his evil claws. Little Miss J and P and myself have very little to do with him. However, Mr J and P adores him. I often come down in the morning to find Mr J and P at the kitchen door gazing lovingly at Dennis in the run and pointing at him saying “Aaaaah, look at him”. When Mr J and P picks Dennis up to put him back in his hutch, he always holds him in a way so that he can take one of his paws and waves it at me saying “Look Dennis is saying ‘bye bye’” before bundling him back in the hutch (I have to admit that I duly wave back saying “Bye bye Dennis” - daft or what?).

Anyway, enough of this nonsense. The whole point of this post is to say that as part of Mr J and P’s (forthcoming) birthday prezzie, I have made him a rabbit cushion. Yes. Me. Made it. With my own clumsy hands. Want to see it? (and don’t say that you could do with a good laugh). Here it is.

One side:



T’other side:



OK, you can stop laughing now. Yes, I know its face is a little pointy but I’m hoping Mr J and P won’t notice. I’ve only ever sewed in straight(ish) lines before so this was my first attempt at sewing something remotely curvey (and boy was that difficult).

Oh well, I’ll love you and leave you. Just one more snap of Mr J and P (looking slightly demented if you ask me) with a magnificent lettuce from our allotment.



Bet Dennis would like to get his teeth round that little beauty (the lettuce I mean and not Mr J and P. Mind you..........).

P.S. If I'm feeling brave, I may try and post my work of art on Kirsty's blog here. Why don't you pop along and see what real crafters have been up to this week.